Wednesday, 29 July 2009
Written & Directed by: Desi Singh
Starring: Gary Daniels, Tina-Desiree Burg & Desi Singh
Monster movies are usually a safe bet for a bit of fun. Throw in a cool monster, a neat setting, a bunch of disposable characters, a hero to fight the monster come the showdown and ramp up the action. Reptilicant actually has most of these ingredients: a shape shifting monster; the deserted Alcatraz prison; a bunch of inept jewel thieves; action star Gary Daniels as the hero; and there is plenty of gunplay and a scrap between Daniels and the beastie. But low and behold none of this makes Reptilicant much fun; the monster suit isn’t convincing despite mostly being old school prosthetics; the characters are bunch of annoying twerps who seem to carrying toy guns around; Daniels is wasted and looks as embarrassed to be in this as you probably will be watching it; and the action is lame save for the actual half decent fight between Daniels and the monster at the end.
Now there is no doubt a movie like Reptilicant is not supposed to be taken seriously, as no monster movie should be, but the whole movie is just so amateur, any fun that could have been had just evaporates. Unless it is unintentional of course. After a six pack and when watched with a group of friends, Reptilicant will no doubt be a hoot as its ineptitude does provide a lot of entertainment. If the acting and special effects weren’t bad enough, then check out the ridiculously inappropriate music and random sound effects. Even poor old Gary Daniels can’t save this one (and apparently only appeared in it as a favour to the producer) and at one point gets to rip off the famous glass gloves scene from Kickboxer. Except this time he makes his fighting gloves from diamonds, the only thing that can kill the monster (don’t ask!), and it’s either a cool little homage to a great film or just another low point in this mess of a monster movie.
To be fair none of the actors seem to be taking proceedings that seriously and probably just meant it as a bit of fun, there is that decent fight at the end and the final twist is still pretty cool even if it is signposted a mile off. For better monster action check out either of The Guyver movies or the recent Feast (the first one) and for a fun Daniels vehicle watch Fist of the North Star or one of his many PM Entertainment flicks again instead. I like monster movies, even bad ones, but Reptilicant even tested my tolerance for crap movies. If you are gonna watch (and I still recommend that you do) best have a six pack near by. Actually, make it two.